March 18, 2009

Remember, Son, Don't Take A Knife To A Tattoo Parlor Gun Fight

Judging from the number of people who emailed this tip to me, a lot of dads are wondering what is up with Taunton, Massachusetts' most misunderstood parenting philosopher/mixed martial arts aficionado, Stone Cold Derek Lindsay.

Last we heard, Lindsay was still busy teaching his son--by example, mind you, none of this namby pamby book-learnin' or pop-in-the-DVD crap in the Lindsay house--Important Life Lessons about how, with great power comes great responsibility. Or maybe it's how, with great unbridled rage and deep contempt for authority, comes great likelihood that you're gonna get your ass arrested and thrown in jail. Same difference.

Brockton, MA's local paper The Enterprise reports that Lindsay was arrested last night in a Middleboro tattoo parlor after stabbing a guy in a brawl, then threatening to kill anyone who talked to the police. Another man was arrested for kicking the same guy's ass. Seriously, "assault and battery with a shod foot." Before police could arrive on the scene, though, the tattoo parlor owner used his legally licensed firearm to get Lindsay and his sidekick [heh] to calm down and talk about their feelings.

This is the 142nd arraignment for Lindsay, who The Enterprise describes as a "career criminal." Considering that this time last year, he was only on his 130th arraignment [for picking a fight with the fighters--and cops--at an extreme fighting match], and he did have $4,000 cash on him last night at the tattoo parlor, so he's clearly doing something right.

Taunton man busted again in Middleboro [enterprisenews.com via like six people]
Previously, 2008: From The DT Dept. Of Corrections: Stone Cold Derek Lindsay Is A Kick-Ass Dad
2007: Stone Cold Derek Lindsay Stars In Disorderly Conduct 41: Big Mac Attack

8 Comments

I'm not in favor of 3 strikes rules, but 142 arraignments?

What a complete waste of space this guy is. Looks like he will do some time for this one. But you know how it goes...he'll be out in 5 worse then he is now.

What a complete and total fuck-up this moron is.

This is one ugly guy...check his mugshot...

whoa. but maybe he's just angry at all the injustice that all those cops and judges have been throwing his way. Or maybe he's threatening to kick the mugshot photographer's ass?

On the other hand, he also looks to be a Celtics fan--and a platinum-level member of the tattoo parlor's frequent inker club. I'm sure this whole thing is just a misunderstanding among old friends.

its a drug deal gone bad. not the tattoo parlors fault the one got stabbed brought it there were he works. get it right. if u wheren't there then shut up.

Thanks for helping to clear that up. I whasn't there, so I had no idea what a guy with 142 arrests was planning to do with 4 knives, $4,000 in cash, and a sidekick with a rap sheet almost as long as his own.

Ohhhhh...it was just a drug deal gone bad. Well well well....I say that we should let him go then.

Jesh...sorry we didnt get it right. He's a great guy

DUDE IS A PSYCO .. I KNOW HIM AND HIS WHOLE FAMILY.LETS JUST SAY THE APPLE DONT FALL FAR FROM THE TREE.HE IS A WASTE OF FUCKIN AIR! IT WASNT A DRUG DEAL GONE BAD EITHER. AND THE KID WHO WAS STABBED DIDNT WORK AT THE TATTOO PARLOR..SERIOUSLY WHO EVEN CARES HE WONT DO TIME HE NEVER DOES. SO OBVIOUSLY HE`S A SNITCH OR SUMTHIN. HE HAS DML TATTOOED ON HIS NECK IT SAYS DERANGED MENTAL LUNITIC THATS HIS INITIALS. DUDE IS A JUNKY , DRUG DEALIN, STERIOD FREAK.. [threat of violence removed by editor. -ed.]

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