Now this next item, it's a really immaculate piece. Exquisite workmanship, pure class. A gentleman--really, he's an artist--right here in Staten Island--really, he's like a father to me, a true inspiration, what he does--he took a plain little wooden children's table from some Danish broad--really, it wasn't even a table, more of a stool, a toadstool, you might say--and he added this beautiful piece of Carrara marble, from the old country--
He started from nothing--not that the Danes--and she's passed, rest her soul--not that the Danes don't make high quality furniture, just that they don't know class--as I was saying, he started from nothing and created a veritable heirloom. Michelangelo himself could not have made a classier children's table. Or stool.
You know what I'm gonna do? I'm going to give it to you--a gift from me, because I know that you can appreciate fine workmanship like this, and it would break my heart if this table didn't go to a cultured home such as yourselves--you have children, right? Take care of them and thank God for them every night--I'm going to give this table to you for just thirty dollars. No, no, don't thank me. It's enough to know that your lovely children will be sitting around this table--with coasters, you do have coasters.
I'll just have my associate put it in your trunk for--oh, what's that? Not the trunk? No, of course, I understand completely. Hey Paulie! Wrap up the toadstool table and put it in the gentleman's car for him. The passenger seat!