Jessica Francis Kane's no Judith Warner, fortunately, but she does take a look at "Supermoms" of her/our generation and the bind she sees them get into when it comes to shared parenting:
the woman who ultimately wants to mix work and mothering would do better to delegate sooner. Otherwise it’Äôs all too easy for the father to slip into the part of poor, bumbling Dad, who can’Äôt even pack the diaper bag. The gender-role divide may start small, but it grows, becoming a self-propagating system, so that by the time the mother is ready for an equal partner in childcare, she’Äôs essentially trained her best, cheapest, most loving resource to be a babysitter to whom she must give instructions.Daddies Unbound [themorningnews.org]
Hmm, nobody seems all a-flutter about the terrible danger of Gender Roles when it comes time to kill a spider or change the oil filter in Mom's car. Funny, that.
["...he's essentially trained his best, cheapest, most loving auto maintenance resource to be a full-service gas junkie to whom you must give instructions..." -ed.]