My wife and mother-in-law spent a good portion of the holiday yesterday working on a quiet book for the kid. It's going to clock in at around 12 pages, and I have a feeling it will be exquisite, beyond the abilities of almost any Chinese prison factory to replicate.
The tiny little outfits on the "hang the laundry" page are stored in a basket built up from grosgrain ribbon to look more basket-y, for example. Forget their actual billing rates; if these women were paid minimum wage for making this book, it'd end up costing $500. And all to keep her quiet in church.
But the guy in me can't help but wonder what would happen--and I'm just speaking hypothetically here, you understand--what would happen if you bought a hardcover copy of the out-of-print South Park: A Stickyforms Adventure!, and just removed the five or so swear word vinyl stickers? [Unitarians can remove the Satan stickyform, too; whatever feels good, right?] Could you keep a kid just as quiet in church by re-enacting the duck-billed platypus Kenny episode for him over and over? Or would you go to hell?
Make sure to get a sticker count first: South Park Sticky Forms Adventures, used and new from $1.28 [amazon]