November 15, 2005

Toy Cars For--For Hastening The Apocalypse, Really

toy_cadillac_escalade.jpg

Metrodad was surfing around Wal-Mart.com, [See? Even with the whole Dadcentric thing, he's still Metrodad from the block, people.] where he found this sweet and/or desperately wrong in so many ways Fisher-Price Power Wheels Cadillac Escalade [with "all the bling of the real thing"!] I'll promise to buy one for the kid as soon as Wal-Mart shows a white girl driving a black boy around in it.

mini_mini_ferrari.jpgIt got me to wondering if that was really the best/worst toy car you could buy for your kid, and of course, it's not. I had in mind the battery-powered BMW Z4 or the Porsche Boxster, both by Berchet, a leader in obnoxious children's versions of adult toy cars.

But we're in a different world now, and those cars are all so November 14th. Because Berchet also makes a toy version of the Ferrari Enzo, which is the car Penny Lancaster drove fiance, Rod Stewart's sample to the sperm bank in. $539.99 at Amazon/Toyscamp.com

[update: Roger posted a link to the ACTUAL toy BMW I saw that made me think the yuppie apocalypse was coming, it's much better/worse, depending on your opinion of BMW's. It's also only $80 at bmwonline.com.]

6 Comments

At one point I thought I was going to use the points on my BMW Visa to get money off the future purchase of an M6. When reality hit, I decided to chuck the card (switched to the Amazon Visa) and use the points for any BMW junk I thought worthwhile. Well nothing really hit me except the kidís toys and since a little homunculus was on the way, I said what the hell (since it was free).

When the Fedex lady dropped off the box and asked what was in it - I told her it was a BMW 6 series and she said, ěthose toy cars really jump in value, I would question whether to scuff it up or keep it pristine and maybe sell it in a few years. I saw one sell for $1,800.î

Remember this car was technically free. Hmmmmm, what to do, what to do?

BTW I didn't get the battery powered one. If the little bastard wants to use it, heíll have to use the pedals.

Well, there is always this $30,000 FAO off-roader thingy but for that price you might as well get the kid his own car and let him drive around your estate with the butler riding shotgun to supervise.
http://www.fao.com/catalog/product.jsp?productId=4302

My friend got this for my kid's birthday:

It's a ride-on BMW racer (not motorized). It's actually great - it's the only ride-on we have where the steering wheel works, and it rolls really smoothly.

[waitaminnit, THAT'S the best/worst BMW I was thinking of. Even better/worse than the motorized version. The steering wheel works, but the turn signals don't--just like on real BMW's. heh. thanks, -Mercedes-driving ed.]

What, you don't want your little precious riding around in the Barbie jeep? Ah, can't say as I blame you.
I nearly barfed when i saw the Escalade. I am suddenly in a lot better place with Monster's John Deere obsession.

...I'm holding out for the H1. I mean, we have a Cameleon, so it's a natural next step, eh? LOL.

There's a little girl that lives somewhere in our neighborhood and I have never seen her walk more than about 10 feet. She rides a pink and yellow battery powered ATV. Everywhere.

My only consolation is that kids like this will be atrophied and have health issues thusly ensuring less competition for my son.

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