Yow. I just read writer Jonathan Tropper's gut-wrenching account of his and his wife's discovery--at their 20-week ultrasound--that their fetus had an inexplicable, rare, and fatal abnormality.
He explains how they wrestle with the shock and grief, and how they came to terms--at least somewhat--with their experience. Not for the weak of tear duct.
Goodbye Too Soon [nyt magazine]
Couldn't even begin to read it.
We lost our first attempt fairly early. The embryo just didn't have a heartbeat. It was still really hard on the both of us.
I truely feel for anyone who has lost a child, I could never wish something like that on my worst enemy.
We waited a little bit longer and then we have been blessed by another child, however we will never forget the one that was lost too soon.
Our neighbors just endured this. And the worse part? She is a dental hygienist which means that there is going to be a period of time, six months from now, where every couple of hours, every day, she will have to explain what happened when well intentioned patients say, "Congratulations! How is the baby?"
I can't claim to have been through anything quite like that, but I am in a bit of a state after my experience today. We went into hospital for an early scan at 6-7 weeks only for my wife to be rushed into theatre as they suspected a ruptured eptopic pregnancy.
She's still in as I type, but thankfully the diagnosis was wrong so she's still intact. Needless to say, she's also no longer pregnant. It was our first pregancy after several years of trying.
For the full story, see my blog.
Thanks for being here.