A very polite gentleman just made me this exclusive offer in the comments section of an un-related post. [Note to corporate and publicist types: the email works better. -dt]
It sounds so sweet, I thought I'd check with the general readership to see if Daddy Types needs a service like this.
I'd always assumed that if you were reading this far, you've already established--or at least accepted--the fact that you're the baby daddy. But I've been wildly wrong before, so if a bunch of you are in this company's target demo, speak up. Then, of course, wait a couple of days until I can hook you up with some nice, pricey testing:
Dear daddytypes.com,I just wanted to take a minute and thank you for the great resource your website provides for fathers. Its nice to know that there are many people concerned with the importance of the fatherís role in the family. Because of the valuable resources that your website offers, I want to give you the opportunity to become an affiliate site for [company], a DNA testing center that specializes in paternal DNA analysis. Since 1997 [company] has helped thousands of men establish paternal ties [and, presumably, helped thousands more avoid them. -dt]. Since [company] offers a generous 20% commission, this is a wonderful opportunity to generate revenue for yourself while providing a valuable resource to visitors to your website. In fact, our top affiliate last year received over $11,500 in commissions. Besides making extra reveune [sic] through your website, by being an affiliate for [company] you can also provide one more valuable resource for visitors to your website.
For more information on joining the [company] Affiliate Team, please visit us at: http://www.[company].com/[friendly-sounding affiliate manager]
Affiliate Manager
[etc etc]@[company].com
hahahahhahahahahhahahah
Actually, there are days, when he is in a particularly foul mood and it is is -30C out, that I would like someone to prove to me that I am not his father...
Crap - you tryin' to get me busted?
OMG - do I have to have a baby to read this? OR be a baby? Or a daddy?
Crap.
I'm sorry, were you led here by mistake by the Michael Jackson lyrics in the title?