"Our unique, patented device allows for the safe transport and storage of individual bananas letting you enjoy perfect bananas anytime, anywhere.
"The Banana Guard was specially designed to fit the vast majority of bananas. Its other features include multiple small perforations to facilitate ventilation thereby preventing premature ripening and a sturdy locking mechanism to keep the Banana Guard closed. The Banana Guard is of course dishwasher safe for easy cleaning."
The Banana Guard is available in literally a rainbow of colors, plus pink ($CN4.99 each, or $CN8.99 for a 2-pack) and glow-in-the-dark ($CN6.99 each). The plummeting USD keeps me from making any jokes about Canadian-dollar-based pricing.
I will, however, mock the 4-6 week delivery time; nothing would make me smile more than the idea of a confident Canadian inventor, his house full to the rafters with Banana Guards, poised to incite a global revolution in banana transport.