December 9, 2010

Gucci: Buy It For The Children

Santa Maria Novella Guccia, Padre Figlio e Spirito Santo!

Gucci has had a long, ridiculous tradition of offering stunt gifts for babies and other pets. Now they've gone and created an actual Gucci Children's Collection. Two collections, actually, one for 0-2 and one for 2-8. I believe this is the showroom.


I know what you're thinking: "Seriously, Gucci? Pink, blue and purple?? Ten years, I've been waiting, and that's the best you can come up with? WTF?" "How am I supposed to justify dropping $1,600 on a size 3T suede trenchcoat when there are children starving in Africa, Haiti, Pakistan, America..." beat down the last shreds of conscience over the fact that my husband's entire bonus was derived from arbitraging the Treasury bailout against the Fed? retain my sense of moral unassailability, at least as long as it takes the driver to load this shit into the back of the Yukon? {Wow, fellow Gucci shopper, knowing what you're thinking is harder than I thought!]

We needn't have worried, though, because Gucci's got you covered:

Over the last six years, Gucci's partnership with UNICEF has helped to raise more than US Dollars 8 million. Now, in celebration of the launch of its children's collection Gucci is making a further commitment to UNICEF's 'Schools for Africa' program with a pledge of US Dollars 1 million. 'Schools for Africa' aims to increase access to quality basic education for all children, with a special emphasis on helping the most disadvantaged, because an education is a gift forever.
Haha yeah, and those $285 double-G baby jeggings'll last you about six weeks!


But seriously, folks. Gucci is really doing this for the children. They brought noted momtivist Jennifer Lopez into the project as as a goodwill ambassador. And there's an inspiring video of the tremendous contribution--and sacrifice--she and her family made, braving a trip to the wilds shores of Malibu, where their entourage of stylists was battered by ferocious winds.


And my heart almost broke at the end when an obviously distraught Lopez and her husband were forced to leave their own children behind because their car only had two seats.


Oh, Ferrari, when are you finally going to think of the children?

Gucci Children's Collection Spring/Summer 2011 []
Yow, does head-to-toeing it mean your kid comes out looking like a snotty eurobrat? [nytimes]



Every child is entitled to an education. But only the children of the rich and famous are entitled to an instructor demonstrating exactly how to look like your having fun playing in the sand.

Oh, Ferrari, when are you finally going to think of the children?

In case you're not Prince Jefri, the 612 Scaglietti supposedly has a real back seat.

I would look at the collection, make a mental note of all the things that I would buy for my kids, calculated the cost of the "purchase" and put that amount into the college savings fund. Seriously....

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