January 19, 2010

An Incomplete List Of Things That Are Not A Toy

Plastic bag
The stove
Silverware drawer
The toaster
The microwave
The toilet
My phone
My iPod
My computer
Your mother's phone
Your mother's computer
Your mother's purse
The car door lock
That window button
All the stuff in your dresser
And your sister's dresser


I have been wanting to start the following list for my daughter:

Things to NOT throw behind the radiator (because it would throw out your dad's back to have to lift the 50 lb. radiator cover to get it)

Things to not hide in random places throughout the house (because it's not fun for us to look all over the god*amn place for your little bunny that you must absolutely have to nap/sleep)

there's more, my brain is just cramping right now.

dude, you have a phone AND an iPod? get with the times...

It's always the second one. You have to watch them, they are sneaky.

Then they teach the 3rd kid all those tricks and more. Oi.

Irwin Mainway begs to differ with you.

I bought a Touch precisely because I DON'T want an AT&T phone. I believe I am vindicated on this point.

Nice list. Car keys would be on my list.

The remote control. The trash can (and anything you find inside). The useless outlet plug covers that you pull out so you can put in your mouth.

The story of my life in a list- thank this was funny because it is true. I would add
The Fridge
Your father's eyeglasses
Yogurt as paint

Your dinner...

your sibling's dinner...

your mother or father's dinner...

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