November 17, 2006

Michael Jackson Is Insane, Ch. MMVI


OK, call me dim and uninformed, even though I'm writing a freakin' book on celebrity parenting. But I did not know Michael Jackson actually calls that kid "Blanket." I thought it was just a tabloid nickname.

Of course, Blanket is the realest to me of all "Jackson's" kids, thanks to the untouchably awesome, a blog written by one of my heroes, Paul Ford. 3.5 years ago he wrote a post, "Selections from My Name is Blanket, © 2046 Blanket Jackson," which feels like it's already true, even though it's still 40 years in the future:

My name was a problem. I had no regular playmates, aside from my siblings and the occasional busload of orphans. But on the occasions when the ranch had any visitors my own age or slightly older, they would call me Pillow, or, if they were French children, Duvet. When I was 9 I developed a bedwetting problem that would not subside, and the housekeepers nicknamed me Wet Blanket, and then, when the special anti-bedwetting system was installed, Rubber Blanket.
"I would like to thank my wonderful children, Paris, Prince, and Blanket, for their unconditional love and support." []
Selections from My Name is Blanket, © 2046 Blanket Jackson []
Wow, Sunday is the 4th anniversary of the Blanket Dangle []

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