April 19, 2005

Will The Owner Of The Precious Moments Toddler Bed Please Come To The Front?

precious_moments_bed.jpgOK, first off, let me say thank you to everyone who clicks through and buys stuff at Amazon, Babies R Us, babystyle, and the other places where Daddy Types gets a little cut of the business.

If you didn't know, Daddy Types can get at least a little commission--maybe 2-3%--of whatever you buy, not just stuff that's linked directly. So when you're feeling spendy and want to show some support for the site, you could, say, start your Amazon shopping trips here. Or you could even click through to babystyle to buy that Bugaboo (full disclosure: OK, that'd be totally bank if you did that.) if you were finally persuaded. Because after all, shopping, like television, is all about sharing the love.

And while the retailers will show me what items have been ordered (and what my teeny slice is, I'll never know who bought what, or with what, or any identifying information like that.

Which is why I'm asking this weekend's buyer of the Precious Moments Toddler Bed from Babies R Us to contact me privately. I don't feel like I've "earned" the $1.52 this sale netted me, and I'd like to return it to you. Plus, I'm sure you have a good explanation for why you bought this bed, and I'd like to share it (anonymously, if you prefer) with the rest of the site.

The Precious Moments Toddler Bed, $59.99 at Babies R Us/Amazon
Previously: Precious Moments Stroller?? PLEASE MAKE IT STOP


I just threw up a little in my mouth.

Perhaps this is just an over the top April Fool's joke? Please ...

I'd be happy to support the site but I'm not sure how to "start [my] Amazon shopping trips here" - is there a page with special links?

a quote from the first review at Amazon:

"I bought this bed for my two year old daughter because it looked cute and she loves precious moments."

odd that everyone hates it because it is unstable not because it is ugly as all hell.

Would she love precious moments so much if there weren't a thousand collectable items already in mom's china cabinet?

I can taste puke too!

Anytime you click through to any Amazon or Babies R Us link (like the one on the sidebar, or the ones above, for that matter), Daddy Types gets at least partial credit for whatever you purchase that session.

I've never really emphasized it on the site, mostly because I didn't want to seem like too much of a shill. Now, of course, I realize it's too late, so what the heck?

Mostly though, I mentioned it to explain how I knew someone had bought the bed, which is NOT something I've ever linked to.

I guess I just don't understand why you have to be so judgemental about what other people are buying. Can't you just accept that everyone has different styles? Why do you need an explanation from someone just because they like different things? Just take the $1.52 and be happy that you have it.

Because Precious Moments is a billion dollar corporation masquerading as a religious enterprise, that panders to the lowest common denominator of sentimentality, shallowness, and over-idealizing, infantilizing, reality-avoiding kitsch?

Come on, I try to keep an open mind and be good-natured about most things, and I also try strenuously to avoid polemics and inflammatory rants [like the sentence above].

But that said, the whole point here is to be somewhat judgmental, or as I like to think of it, constructively discerning. To find things that are better, especially for dads. Ultimately, I'm trying to provide information and experience that helps other dads be better informed and more involved in judgments and decisions for their own kids.

Precious Moments feels, to me--as a man and as a dad--targeted exclusively at women in a way that I find alienating, or at least off-putting. To me. And a lot of it also commodifies religious sentiment in a way that I find personally offensive. Which doesn't automatically negate someone else's sincere connection with it, but a true believer PM-ist needs to know and respect the fact that their views are not automatically shared by others.

Now if you really don't want your $1.52 back...

Oh, I don't know - as a woman and a mother, I feel fairly alienated by Precious Moments as well!

Did you read some of the Amazon reviews of this bed? Give Heather her money back so she can apply it to her legal prosecution fund when she sues their sorry ass*s for trying to pawn such a huge piece of cr*p off on the unsuspecting children of unquestionably tacky parents.

Unless it's unchristian to sue such a fine, upstanding and godly company.

I for one truly appreciate your "trying to provide information and experience that helps other dads be better informed and more involved in judgments and decisions for their own kids."

In totally dissing this horrible (and by that I mean ugly PLUS dangerous) thing, you are fulfilling your mission proudly.

Ok, first of all, stop trying to make it look like I bought that bed. Not only do I not care for precious moments myself, but I DON'T HAVE KIDS. Don't you remember, you said my husband and I shouldn't have kids because we are gun owners....but let's not go there again.

I appreciate that you are trying to provide information for other fathers. But here's the way I see it. You do your best to showcase what you think are great products. If someone reads your site, then goes out and buys something else, it is their problem if it's not safe, or just ugly, etc. You've done your service by providing the information. If they choose not to use those products, so be it. They can't say they weren't informed.

I'm going to have to chime in with Heather here. Who cares what people buy? I started reading this blog as we are expecting our next in May, and thought it would be nice to get a dad's perspective. More and more, however, I get the feeling that the site is not showcasing "great products", but status symbols. I frankly wouldn't buy 90% of the things I see on here - I don't feel a deep burning need to have a Bugaboo, or spend an outrageous amount on a crib when the neighbors will lend us theirs.

Maybe I just get a different vibe, being a gun-owning, midwestern red-stater.

...he says to the guy who changes his kid's diapers on a $50 steel tool cart.

The fact that that bed is a tacky, rickety piece of junk has nothing to do with guns or red states or status symbols.

kids don't need the extraneous crap, whether it's a Bellini whatever handpainted fantasy crib or Precious Moments, any more than an adult needs a Porsche Cayenne or the King Ranch F-150.

I call it like I see it, and I honestly think friends don't let friends buy Precious Moments.

But maybe you're right, Maybe it's like when a friend marries someone you don't like. Once they go through with it, you just gotta suck it up and wish them the best. And be quietly grateful that you're not the one who has to wake up next to her every morning. Maybe this bed is like that.

Now how about puttin' those guns down and giving me some dad perspective and tips from this "Midwest" you mentioned?

For the record, Chad certainly does NOT represent all of us 'dere Midwestern red-staters. (Kerry supporters don't buy Precious Moments.) Were I able to afford it, Norah would have her diapers changed on a quarter-sawn Amish-made oak boudoir. Alas, we'll make do with the 35-year old half-dresser that we inherited from my parents.

hey, watch what you say about Deere.

I learned to drive on a John Deere when I was ten.

Okay, now THAT'S a Midwestern sentiment, right there. Learning to drive on a tractor is as Midwestern as shooting hoops in northern Indiana.

So, Chad sez:

"I get the feeling that the site is not showcasing "great products", but status symbols."

I think Greg showcases lots of things for lots of reasons -- because he loves them or hates them or is amused by the marketing of them, whatever. I'm in the midwest, too, and even though the crib and changing table we have aren't cool or status symbols, I think Greg would approve because they are durable and a plain, clean design. Reasonably priced, too. But of course they are no longer available retail (bought 'em for the first kid eight years ago) because they were too sensible or something.

What makes a product great is in the eye of the beholder. What makes them interesting to blog readers may be another. Greg highlights both sorts of products. I'm betting he doesn't buy anything from Pottymouth, for instance, but he seems intrigued by the "I'm too punk to be a parent" products out there.

Define 'status symbol' please.....

Because I drive a certain car and my kids wear costly norwegian sweaters and I own an Xplory etc. doesn't make me a status-obsessed snob. Because I wouldn't let my kid sleep in a plastic bed thats *BARF* powder blue doesn't make me one either. I didn't buy any of these things becuase they represent 'status' I bought them becuase they meant something to me. Just becuase the kid won't appreciate a $800 stroller, doesn't mean that I don't or my husband doesn't.

We work just as hard as the guy who picks up our garbage, sure what we do isn't manual labour, but working hard for one's money is working hard for it. The things we buy aren't the trappings, they are things we invest in becuase we like them. I change(d) diapers on an old dresser, my crib has been used by 3 of my 5. We still have the highchair that my first one used, but geewhilikers, when I see something like Playsam's rocking Saab, I want one, not that my kid doesn't just love his rocking moose (there, I got that in....) but he'd love that Saab just as much, and I'd like it and my husband would REALLY like it.....we only wish we'd fit in it.

No, your kids don't need $200 Nikes, they need good parents, but buying those Nikes doesn't make me a bad parent.

PS - I'd never buy $200 Nike's. I buy some of my kids shoes off Ebay, except for my teenager's shoes, cuz she'd die if I made her wear used shoes. When they still can't vote, then they get what they get.

MennoDaddy - I never claimed to represent everybody. I was simply trying to play off the "red-staters are ignorant hicks" theme that's already passe. Bad attempt at a joke...

Chris - I agree with what you're saying. Our gear's been around the block and through the family several times, but it's functional, sturdy, and not entirely ready to be scrapped yet.

Uma - I consider something to be a status symbol if I have to drop a house payment on it ($800 stroller?), where I could get something that performs the same function much, much cheaper. I'm not saying that I neglect my kid, but at the rate she goes through clothes, shoes, etc. there's no sense in my mind to spending excessive amounts of money for something that she won't be able to use in 6 months. If she'd let me put a brick on her head so she'd stop growing...

Well, what if your house payments are much more than $800? Then is it no longer a status symbol?

There's no need to be pedantic. I have no idea what your house payments are. I know what mine are, and what range most of my neighbors pay. I was trying to make a point that instead of buying a stroller for $800, my inclination would be to spend half or quarter that on something that functions just as well, and save the remainder.

um, let's move at least most recriminating discussions of how much people make to urbanbaby.com; the ladies there have it down to a science.


and let's also keep in mind that many people have embarassingly tacky suburban or hillbilly pasts they're now trying to save their kids from, so unless we all want to pull out our own baby pictures and do some serious dorkornot.com, maybe we should just talk about something non-controversial like breastfeeding or cloth diapers.

I confess, I bought the Eddie Bauer Blue Glacier Booster Car Seat for Norah. Should I turn in my Liberal Membership Card now?

I have encountered this sort of thing a lot with my inlaws. If I happen to like what they don't I am a snob, but if the like what they like, it's just their taste.

Besides, why would anyone care whether someone else likes their Precious Moments bed? I certainly don't care if others like my furniture, so if I came across a web site knocking my tastes, I wouldn't leave them a message saying they shouldn't "be so judgmental."

Also - what an odd thing to start a debate ...

Chad, one thing to bear in mind is that many urbanites who buy $800 strollers don't have cars. Here in NYC your stroller is the equivalent of your car. I roll mine anywhere between 1 and 8 miles a day, every day of the year. So to drop $800 on your primary mode of transportation isn't buying it to be a status symbol. I don't own a Bug or an Xplory--they came out after my kid was past the new stroller age, and I don't have the space in my apartment or my budget for them. But you can bet that the price to value ratio is far better on a Bug than it is on my crappy Maclaren Techno. I makes no sense to pay extra money just for frills, but to pay for better performance and durability--of course.

Would we feel better about the judgements if Greg had named the site gofugyourbabygear.com instead?

I think some folks are getting a little too excited here. If Greg wants to promote the Bugaboo or hammer on Precious Moments, that's his perogative. If you haven't realized it by now, Greg's disdain for crappy/ugly plastic stuff is a driving force on DT.

If you dislike DT, then you might start a blog about how you dislike it. Or, in the least, you wouldn't come here anymore--go to everythingisnicetypes.com. But hopefully you will just relax.

As a related note, that toddler bed is awesome. (Awesome in the horrific/WTF manner.)

I think people forget this is a blog, and greg's blog, at that. He doesn't need to be objective, like the media *cough, cough* -- he can say whatever he damn well pleases.

I don't always agree with him (sorry, Greg), but I agree with some things, and get some good info here...

Moxie - thanks for the explanation. It makes a lot more sense to me now why people would spend so much for a stroller. I live within walking distance of practically nothing, so my stroller will see more use weighing down the back of the car than anything.

I was telling Greg earlier today that most of my perceptions are probably due to a culture clash - sometimes being an ig'nant hick isn't all it's cracked up to be!

I read this debate with interest until I got to the comment about Maclaren Technos being crappy, and then I forgot everything else.

I love my My Maclaren Techno.

That is all.

Can I just say that I didn't use my strollers for six months, I used them on consecutive children for like, three years each. With that much mileage (time and distance wise), they were worth the money.

Like Moxie (though I live in NoVa, not NYC), I used my stroller every day for years. I commuted with it on the subway, and it made so much difference to have one that was lightweight and could turn corners well and quickly (in and out of elevators, etc.). Loved my Maclaren and it was well worth the money -- when I had to use the Graco for a couple of days, the difference was clear.

Don't know if I could've made myself spring for a Bugaboo -- probably not -- but lots of people couldn't see paying for a Maclaren ($250-$350)which previously was my idea of an expensive stroller. All depends on what you use it for.

This is the most hysterical thread I have read in a long time.

So with the link to this from that designblogthingy, I gotta ask...did the person who bought the bed ever out themselves? [afraid not. Or more precisely, afraid TO, at least after the heated back-n-forth in the comments. -ed.]

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