June 30, 2014

You'll Never Guess The Corporation That's Shamelessly Melting Your Heart

So we took the kids to the movies the other night, a non-trivial event for them, because srsly, what would they ever go see: 1) some too-loud, dumb, animated fart-fest full of Gen Y culture references they know nothing about or 2) Frozen?

Anyway, this commercial came on, and by about 20 seconds in, I was getting really pissed about having my emotions manipulated so baldly and relentlessly for--for what, who knows? Cell phones? Lunchables? Life insurance? There really is no way of knowing, and it was only becoming more and more obvious that it didn't matter: cue the swelling violins, this was pure, uncut propaganda, and we were its captive targets.

At 0:54 the text came up, "Isn't it time we celebrate Dads?" and someone in the theater actually called out, "Yes!" Meanwhile, I'm fuming behind my tears, going, "It's like you don't even read my blog!"

And then it turns out I'm wrong, because it's an ad for Dove Mens Care.

Now anyone who's been around the dadblog world at all the last couple of years knows Dove Mens Care has been a prominent and consistent sponsor of many blogs, including many dads I have long admired and respected. Dove has also sponsored the Dad 2.0 Summit, which is a totally legit example of a genre that I otherwise wish did not exist: the blogger-brandmarketer convention. Dove's people have been repeatedly generous in their offers and respectful in their interactions with me, even though I have consistently declined to include Daddy Types in their marketing campaigns. So much love Dove.

But that's not the point. The point is, I don't like having my emotions played for obviously corporate purposes that I know nothing about--especially because they are withheld from me until literally the last second because, I assume, SOFTEN THEM UP FOR BIG REVEAL.

THIS IS NOT WORKING FOR ME, DOVE MEN+CARE. IT MAKES ME SUSPICIOUS OF YOUR PRODUCT, WHICH TURNS OUT TO BE SOAP AND STUFF. MY FREE ADVICE TO YOU IS COME CLEAN OR DIAL IT BACK.

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