December 4, 2009

DT Friday Freakout: Mall Santa Edition

Even though a trip to any mall is enough to ruin your weekend, we'll expand the reach of the Freakout a bit, just to make sure:

elf_terrorist.jpg


  • While the terrorist elf who threatened to blow up Mall Santa in Georgia has been arrested, he may have accomplices. Until the Fat Man gives the all clear, we should consider anyone in an elf suit a suspect. Help us, Rush Limbaugh, you're our only hope! [wkowtv.com]

  • The makers of Enfamil, Mead Johnson Company [a subsidiary of Bristol Myers Squibb], must pay $13 million for falsely advertising that its formula is better for babies than private-label formula. As you know, the formula for formula is regulated by the FDA. Except for the occasional added sugar. [businesswire.com via dt-reading toy rabbi marjorie]

  • In closely related news, an Indian mother on a United Airlines flight from Washington to Kuwait smothered her four-week-old baby when she fell asleep while breastfeeding. Expect to see giant, gold foil "Breastfeeding Kills!" stickers on the sides of formula cans by January. [ktla]

  • A Patagonian study proved what your grandmother already told you: that bottle and/or pacifier will give the kid a speech impediment. Bweast is best for the first nine months, now la sciencia proves it! [eurekalert; full paper at bmc pediatrics]

  • Science, statistics, blah blah blah. Let's just go with, "Breastfeeding prevents diabetes and heart disease"! [eurekalert]

  • If trendsetting Uganda is right, it's only a matter of time before we switch from "circumcision prevents AIDS" to "foreskins cause AIDS". Ugandan is the male Brazilian! Take it all off! [eurekalert]

  • After the whole "whoops, math is hard!" fiasco where Consumer Reports admitted its car seat crash tests were miscalibrated, it's not surprising that they're taking a low-key blog approach to word that a whole slew of Dorel infant car seats [sold as Cosco, Eddie Bauer, Safety 1st, and Quinny] flew off their bases in crash tests that sometimes exceeded government safety requirements. Transport Canada issued a safety warning anyway, which Dorel is criticizing--even as they "voluntarily" strengthen their base design. [CR safety blog, tc.gc.ca via dt reader lee]

  • An ASU study--by an undergrad, no less--of 20,000 babies identified head position during sleep as the primary cause of flatheaded babies. The study is published in the AAP's No Shit, Sherlock Journal of Pediatrics [eurekalert; abstract]

  • Also in the same issue: a Dutch comparative study of childhood constipation treatments found that enemas and glycol suppositories were equally effective, but that the glycol had a greater incidence of fecal incontinence. [abstract]

  • Did we already know this? It's from October: In England, a "truck" is a "lorry," "crib deaths" are called "cot deaths," and "passing out drunk and/or high on top of your baby" is called "co-sleeping." [eurekalert]

  • The number of children hospitalized each year in the US for food allergy-related conditions more than tripled between 1998 and 2006, thanks to the adoption of new allergy-related diagnosis codes on medical records. [abstract]

  • 16,000 infant autopsy reports don't lie: non-accidental head injury is the most common cause of subdural bleeding. [abstract]

  • Baby daddy drama: depressive symptoms in non-resident African American fathers are correlated to lack of involvement with their kids. [abstract]

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