It's enough to make you cancel cable. Penny Lancaster, the fiancee of ancient rocker Rod Stewart tells this story on a TV cooking show. On TV. On a show about food.
Penny gave a waaay too detailed firsthand [sic] account about helping Rod his sperm banking, just in case the old boy can't, well, let's just say the 60-year-old Stewart HAS been known to run out of gas once in a while. It's a tale so shocking, you'd want to get your stomach pumped.
Anyway, they produced the sample at home "privately, you know, intimately," Lancaster explained, "and then I rushed down in the Ferrari with my handbag and the little vile next to it." I'm assuming she's talking about the sperm sample, not a pet name for Stewart, who was obviously too exhausted to make the sperm bank run himself.
Not skeeved out yet? How about after reading the suddenly suggestive lyrics to "Let Me Be Your Car," a song Stewart released in 1974? When his fiancee was two years old?
How about when you flash forward to 2036, and your daughter brings a grizzled burnout named Sean Combs home for Thanksgiving?