"Look, I made a Pollock," "That new 'don't walk' sign looks like the ones in Europe." City kids say the darnedest things. In this week's Observer, Mary Elizabeth Williams writes a funny, thought-provoking essay on how challenging it can be for cool people to raise kids in the city. Just a couple of highlights:

"Parents share tales on the playground of young Talullah's addiction to edamame, or how Duncan loved the Metallica documentary. And we keep our kids' vices--a fondness for Care Bears or American cheese--conspicuously overlooked...

"I'm trying to recognize when my ego starts butting against not merely the inclinations of my brood, but the enjoyment of my fellow adults. Because it's pretty easy to be a real tool. At the recent Elvis Costello show, a single friend spotted parents in the crowd waving their toddlers like oversized lighters. People, I'm a mother myself and I say to you: Hire a damn sitter."

Go to Hell, Barney! [New York Observer]