March 14, 2007

The Non-Expert's Guide To Baby Naming

Before delivering the main course, a 3-columned table for constructing a baby name "fit for tracking by the police or private collection agencies," TMN's Non-Expert offers some baby naming appetizers. Here are some categories she suggests exploring:

  • American Gladiator names: Zap, Fury, Tower
  • Transformer names: Omega Supreme [trendwarning: the movie's coming out any day now. Also, someone already used Optimus Prime.]
  • Gender-free names future Wesleyan students: Ficus, Alabaster, Schenectady
  • Doctor names
  • Lawyer names
  • Wealthy and influential politician: Former President William Jefferson Clinton
  • Names with a terminating decimal expansion [though Pi is nice, and it IS 3/14]

    The Non-Expert: Better Baby Names Bureau [tmn]


    I swear there was a kid at the park yesterday who answered to "Rolex" when called by his nanny. Oy.

    Conventional or not, as a new parent to be in a couple weeks... I just hope my baby's name doesn't end up on the no-fly list!!

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