July 17, 2006

THIS JUST IN: Moms Kvetch On UrbanBaby. Also, Sun Rises In East


Eight pages and a cover to reveal that, yes, in fact, anonymous moms and pregnant women in NYC still let loose on UrbanBaby's message boards with the rants, the complaints, the criticisms, the angst, and the secrets.

In that weird city way, the utter familiarity of Emily Nussbaum's "whither pregnant feminism?" rumination in New York Magazine is actually reassuring; it lets women having babies in the city know that not a damn thing's changed in 8 or 30 years, take your pick. Not the stresses of juggling parenthood and personal/professional identity. Not the competitive spirit and socioeconomic inequities of urban life. And not the near-total absence of any serious engagement on changes in men's parenting/work/family roles, or any discussion with men [as opposed to about them, which happens all the time.] Except for the cartoon bubbles in the illustrations, this is all the attention dads get in the article:

Men on UrbanBaby are a very strange presence. They are necessary, and they are useless. They are critical, in both senses. Although women sometimes post loving accounts of their husbandĺ─˘s sexiness and smarts, more often men are less loving partners than objects for study: Did I know he was like this when I married him? Has he changed or have I? Search for divorce, and you find women in all stages: about to leave, negotiating settlements, struggling with the mess of a custody dispute, and trying to keep things going.
You've come a long way, UrbanBaby, now how about doing something about this kid's diaper?

Mothers Anonymous [nymag]
Note: Not sure if it's the right word, but congratulations to Oeuf for the sweet Baby Lounger product shot. Same for J. Crew's Crew Cuts line.


there is a reason I am a mommy whose favorite parenting site is, uh, daddytypes. sometimes mommies are freaky.


thank you! thank you! thank you!

i thought i was all alone out here..... dont worry, i wont make any noise_ ill just chuckle along silently in the back row.

with love, emily, husband & baby!

Oh god do I hate the Urban Baby message boards. Anonymity turns the women who frequent them into the mean girls- utter and complete beyotches. Whenever I post a question, they gang up on me and tear me to shreds.

Two examples... I once asked if anyone had any recommendations between two strollers I was considering, Stroller X and Stroller Y. What did they write back? Stroller Z. Then more recently, I posted that I had a dilmemma over how to deal with a mother in my mom's group who accidentally broke a piece of sort of expensive furniture. What they did say back? That I was a bitch for hoping she would help pay for what she broke and that's what I get for having other people in my home.


I won't go back.

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