March 23, 2006

Have I Brainwashed My Daughter To Hate Generic Wipes?

A couple of stretches in NYC ago, we ran out of wipes; I'd forgotten to bring a new Costco brick with me, and the Pampers emergency purchase from a couple of months ago ran out--and anyway, those plastic tubs don't keep wipes moist very long. It seems like all it takes is a day or so for the top 5-6 to dry out.

Which is why I was feeling a little adventurous and bought the Key Food store brand refill pack during a visit to some friends in The Slope. [Do people in Brooklyn actually say that, or is it like San Fran, and Hew-ston Street, verbal badges for identifying hopeless tourists?]

The Key Food wipes were cheap ($3.99 for two 80+/- packs) and come in a resealable pouch. The ducks all over were not a factor. They turned out to be spongy and strong, not scented or gross, and I thought they were a great find.

But by the end of the weekend, the kid was claiming she never needed her diaper changed. Then we'd say, "but you stink honey, and it looks like you're smuggling a frozen cornish game hen in your pants." [See, because there's no way a turkey would --never mind.] And she'd beg us with tears in her eyes, "No wipes! No wipes!" It was really sad.

When we got back to the Costcos her butt knows--and apparently loves--she was happy as a pig in a poke.


Ironicaly enough, I have brainwashed my daughter to only LIKE generic products. Wipes, cheerios, apple juice...we're raising a consumer savvy baby.

We started on the premium brand since we got a bunch as gifts but quickly went to the Costco brand. Once the MIL bought some Kroger brand that fired up The Lu's (my little girl) backside something fierce! Since then, we've strategically place wipes everywhere. We're never caught without and you can freshen up any old ones with a little bit of bottled water...

I just use a burlap sack hanging on a peg on the wall...

Seriously, we usually stock up on the Safeway ones when they're on sale... they seem to be the cheapest you can buy here without resorting to a costco membership.

Um, Greg, aren't Costco wipes generic?

My wife makes handmade wipes based on a recipe our day care provider gave us. Basically, a papertowel roll cut in half, put in a plastic tupperware like container, and then mixed with some water and baby shampoo.

Really cheap, really mild and works.

The only drawback is not ideal for carrying in the diaper bag, so sometimed ya gotta use what you have...

[here's a recipe for making wipes in a home workshop. -ed.]

Costco wipes totally kick ass! (Well, they wipe ass, but you know what I mean.) They're less expensive and far superior to Pampers, Huggies, etc. All hail Kirkland!

i know i run the risk of seeming a horrible pedant, but i thought you might like to know:

a poke is a sack. "a pig in a poke" is something purchased sight unseen. now, it's possible that there are pigs who enjoy being a sack (i have a cat who luvs the cozy, secure feeling that only a satchel can provide; in my house "letting the cat out of the bag" generally means forcibly removing the cat from the bag when, for instance, my husband wants to use his backpack to carry something other than cat).

i think the folksy expression you're looking for is, perhaps somewhat unfortunately, "happy as a pig in shit," or the far less common, but slightly more genteel, "happy as a pig in slop."

[actually, the first was the one that came to mind, considering the subject. But as the grandson of a farmer, I have been sensitized to the negative image of pigs perpetuated by the media. Pigs are by nature rather clean animals, after all. Waitaminnit, my grandfather had a sheep ranch, not a pig farm. I must have picked that up from Charlotte's Web. Anyway, point taken, thanks. -ed.]

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