July 29, 2004

Just heard this: Flight attendant spiked kid's juice with Xanax

I was talking with some friends last night about the kid's big flight this weekend (14 hours to Osaka), and one child-free guy asked, "isn't there something you can give them, you know, to take the edge off?" "Haha, where's the sport in that?" I replied, as my malicious disregard for the welfare of my fellow passengers grew three sizes inside my blackened heart.

Then he told me about this flight attendant who kept trying to give some apple juice to a crying baby on a Northwest flight from Amsterdam. Finally, the kid's mom accepted it, gave her kid a sip, but then stopped when she noticed it was foamy, with blue and white specks in it. The guy had put in a ground up Xanax.

I think he's out of detention now, and working your next flight. Yeah, I'm pretty sure.


I am quite sure a security blanket lightly damp from alcohol works wonders on the kid... At least that was what they traditionally used on children in Scandinavia. Don't think the practise is as common nowadays though.

Good luck with your flight, 14 hours is quite some time for an infant to stay in one noisy place. I guess you'll have to walk up and down the aisle quite a few times to say the least.

Baby Dimetapp. You'll thank me later.

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