March 3, 2006

Oscar Presenters To Briefly Contemplate Keeping Firefly Mobile Phone For Kids

firefly_kids_cell_phone.jpgThe Firefly mobile phone for kids [and people who don't know more than 20 people and like paying 25 cents/minute to talk to them] is included in this year's offical Academy Awards Gift Bag, which is given to presenters and performers at the ceremony.

Now let's run through this partial list of presenters and imagine how receiving a mobile phone for your kid will play out:

  • No kids, and doesn't seem in a hurry to have them: Jessica Alba, Sandra Bullock, George Clooney, J. Lo, Keanu, Charlize, Salma, Queen Latifah, Naomi Watts, Lily Tomlin, Luke & Owen Wilson.
  • A kid, also an endorsement deal with another cell phone company: Ludacris
  • Kids? They could have grandkids by now, people: Morgan Freeman, Meryl Streep, Clint Eastwood.
  • Doesn't seem like the type to let the kids out of sight in the first place: Tom Hanks, Will Smith
  • What, giving their assistant's number to the kids' nanny is somehow not enough?: Nicole Kidman
  • What, a black man can't afford to buy his kid a phone?: Jamie Foxx, Terrence Howard
  • Likely to sue at the slightest mention of their kids using the phone: Uma, Reese
  • In the middle of a breakup, not wanting to think about kids right now, thanks: Hilary Swank
  • Oh sure, could I have three, and could you decorate the cases with Swarovski crystals that spell out "Maddox, Zahara, and Brad Jr."?: Jennifer Aniston

    That leaves Will Farrell Ferrell, whose son Magnus turns two just a couple of days from now. If my kid's reaction to her toy phone is any indicator, the Firefly would make the perfect birthday gift.

    The Official Academy Awards Gift Bag - Contents [girlhacker via waxy]
    Oscar Presenters [oscar.com]
    Previously: Firefly and other cell phones for kids

  • 3 Comments

    Greg, I'm totally telling Will Ferrell that even after you have met him several times, you don't know how to spell his name. And he's going to be really. pissed. off.

    [I write "Will" but in my heart, all I hear is "Colin." -ed.]

    I'm telling him that, too.

    Greg, this is where your Fresh Direct habit is coming back to bite you in the ass. If you spent any time in grocery store lines you'd have read the headlines on In Touch magazine informing you that J. Lo and Marc Anthony are trying to have a baby, and that Salma Hayak has been seen leaving the fertility clinic.

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